Developer Sassy Chap Games has unveiled its latest project: a dating sim like no other. Date Everything! is a sandbox dating sim that allows players to romance a variety of ordinary household objects, from the kitchen fridge to the fire alarm.
Date Everything equips the player-character with a stylish pair of “Dateviator” glasses, which allow the player to see their toaster, smoke alarm, and other household objects in their true (read: human) form. With the Dateviators equipped, a dusty piano is suddenly changed into an attractive woman named Keyes, a moped becomes a handsome man who goes by Cabrizzio, and an old vacuum transforms into a friendly fellow who prefers his nickname, Hoove, to his “legal” name: Hoover. But the romance doesn’t stop there–players can even date intangible things like the air itself and, based on the game’s Steam page description, an “overwhelming sense of existential dread.”
The game features 100 dateable everyday objects, each of which are brought to life by a (human) voice actor. The voice cast includes quite a few well-known names, including Johnny Young Bosch, Felicia Day, Grey DeLisle, and more. Each romance has three different outcomes–the player can become the object’s lover, their friend, or even their mortal enemy.
The 3D overworld changes as the game progresses, and according to Sassy Chap devs, these changes are based on the player’s in-game decisions, suggesting some objects may not be so eager to serve their original purpose if the player burns them romantically. It’s not hard to imagine the intense (and incredibly inconvenient) consequences of experiencing a bitter breakup with your refrigerator, and it’s likely that hell hath no fury like a toaster scorned.
Date Everything also features:
Over four hours of original music, with each dateable item featuring a unique musical theme1.2 million words and 70,000 lines of voiced dialogueOver 11,000 hand-drawn images
Sassy Chap Games has yet to announce a release date for the game, but we do know that upon release, it will be available on PlayStation 5, Xbox Series X|S, Nintendo Switch, and PC.
